The last
time I wrote a short blog, it was to help calm my nerves the day before a
marathon. Now, two weeks later – I’m
writing a short blog to help calm my nerves the day before a marathon.
Tomorrow I
will be running the Brooklyn Marathon, held entirely in Prospect Park. Yes, that’s right. I am attempting to complete a marathon a mere
14 days after I finished the last one.
This race
won’t be as exciting as the New York Marathon.
First, it’s got 500 entrants compared to the New York Marathon’s
50,000. Rather than shutting down traffic
in 5 different boroughs, this marathon is run in the recreation lane of
Prospect Park that is staying open to the public (read: we’ll be dodging dogs and
baby strollers).
I doubt I’ll
be any faster in this race than I was 2 weeks ago. First, as I just said I just ran a marathon 2
weeks ago. Second, my left foot feels
fine, but I have a couple of new body parts that are giving me trouble. You probably want to read about them about as
much as I feel like writing about them, so I’ll spare both of us. Let’s just say that the diagnosis I got from
my personal physician – Dr. Google – wasn’t too bad. Then, via a one on one consultation with my
private therapist – You Tube – I’ve learned how to tape these body parts during
the race to help ease the pain when I run (and I’m guessing to keep the pieces
stuck together should something fall off).
In reality,
I may even fail. In the back of my mind,
I’m admitting that it’s possible that I won’t finish. I’ve only run 3 times since the marathon, and
never more than 6 miles at a clip. I’m
sure my body isn’t completely healed from its last 26.2 mile trek; it may simply
give up. And I’m fine with that.
The other
day at my Weight Watchers meeting, my leader Maggie asked me what has changed
for me since I’ve lost 70 pounds and kept it off almost 4-1/2 years so
far. A few things ran through my mind: I
didn’t fear clothes shopping any more, I didn’t worry about the sides of my ass
hanging off a chair when I sat down, and I’d lost my taste for Haagen Dazs
chocolate ice cream (and what a sad day that was when I figured that out). But I knew that wasn’t Maggie was talking
about. I thought for another second and had my answer: “I’m not afraid to fail.”
When I was
fat, I wouldn’t rise up to any challenge.
I convinced myself that I couldn’t do something before I even tried, and
if I knew I was going to fail, then why bother?
In my journey over the last 5-1/2 years of losing weight, keeping it off
and becoming a triathlete and long distance runner, I’ve learned that there’s
actually a lot I can do and a lot I’ve already done. Yes, my body or mind might crap out and quit
at mile 15 of my second marathon in 3 weeks.
But is trying to do 2 marathons so close together and only getting
through 1½ of them really failure?
Next week I
hope to write a blog about completing the Brooklyn marathon 2 weeks after
completing the NY Marathon. It may end
up being about completing 1-1/2, or possibly even less. But it will never again be about the sides of
my ass hanging off a chair, my new found love of Haagen Dazs chocolate ice
cream, or how I failed at something because I didn’t even try.
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